Leicester City topping the football tree at Christmas, Japan beating South Africa at the Rugby World Cup and Great Britain winning the Davis Cup? Come on.
In fact, I can hear the comedian's version of my introduction now: "Only a fool would attempt forecasts for the next sporting year … (comic pause) … Here's our Sports Editor Nick Powell." Cue guffaws.
Undaunted, here's a bold one for starters: the USA to win the Ryder Cup in Minnesota in October.
Team Europe golfer McIlroy celebrates winning the Ryder Cup during the 39th Ryder Cup singles golf matches at the Medinah Country Club
Team Europe golfer Rory McIlroy celebrates a win in 2015's Ryder Cup
Yes, Europe's golfers have triumphed five times out of six. But there's just a hint that the Americans are starting to understand how much the team ethic means in this competition.
And anyway they would have won three of the last four on home soil, but for Europe's "miracle of Medinah" comeback in 2012. No miracles this time.
By then the Rio Olympics will be part of history. Expect a great deal of overblown pre-Games hype about how nothing will be ready.
Bolt and Farah again? Yes - dominating for the last time on the global stage, perhaps.
Other Brits? The gold rush will slow a little in rowing and sailing, perhaps more than a little in cycling.
Johnson-Thompson of Britain waits for her turn as she competes in the women's long jump qualifying round during the 15th IAAF World Championships at the National Stadium in Beijing
Katarina Johnson-Thompson at the World Championships in Beijing in 2015
Much better from the swimmers, and golden girl this time will be 22-year old heptathlete Katarina Johnson-Thompson, who can outshine Jessica Ennis-Hill.
Formula One? Hamilton again? Probably, though reviving Ferrari might just deliver a title for Sebastian Vettel.
At the Tour de France, instinct suggests Chris Froome probably can't win a third title. Not this time. Last year's runner-up Nairo Quintana may go one better.
Of the individuals without wheels, Rory McIlroy, injury-free, will regain his world number one spot, Andy Murray will win another major (but not the Davis Cup this time) and Tyson Fury will beat Wladimir Klitschko again.
Manchester City v Newcastle United - Premier League
Manchester City could top the Premier League in 2016
England's footballers will see off Wales at the European Championships and reach the semi-finals (France to win on home soil amid much emotion), and Manchester City will be Premier League champions.
India will take cricket's World Twenty20 and England will draw their test series in South Africa.
In the Six Nations rugby, despite the impetus of new coach Eddie Jones, England (and the rest) will find Wales too good as their injured stars return. That kicks off the action on the field.
Off it, we start with another WADA report on doping. And that, I fear, really will set the tone for the year.
If a review of sport in 12 months does not heavily feature drugs, resignations, match-fixing and suspensions, I will be pleasantly surprised.
In fact, I can hear the comedian's version of my introduction now: "Only a fool would attempt forecasts for the next sporting year … (comic pause) … Here's our Sports Editor Nick Powell." Cue guffaws.
Undaunted, here's a bold one for starters: the USA to win the Ryder Cup in Minnesota in October.
Team Europe golfer McIlroy celebrates winning the Ryder Cup during the 39th Ryder Cup singles golf matches at the Medinah Country Club
Team Europe golfer Rory McIlroy celebrates a win in 2015's Ryder Cup
Yes, Europe's golfers have triumphed five times out of six. But there's just a hint that the Americans are starting to understand how much the team ethic means in this competition.
And anyway they would have won three of the last four on home soil, but for Europe's "miracle of Medinah" comeback in 2012. No miracles this time.
By then the Rio Olympics will be part of history. Expect a great deal of overblown pre-Games hype about how nothing will be ready.
Bolt and Farah again? Yes - dominating for the last time on the global stage, perhaps.
Other Brits? The gold rush will slow a little in rowing and sailing, perhaps more than a little in cycling.
Johnson-Thompson of Britain waits for her turn as she competes in the women's long jump qualifying round during the 15th IAAF World Championships at the National Stadium in Beijing
Katarina Johnson-Thompson at the World Championships in Beijing in 2015
Much better from the swimmers, and golden girl this time will be 22-year old heptathlete Katarina Johnson-Thompson, who can outshine Jessica Ennis-Hill.
Formula One? Hamilton again? Probably, though reviving Ferrari might just deliver a title for Sebastian Vettel.
At the Tour de France, instinct suggests Chris Froome probably can't win a third title. Not this time. Last year's runner-up Nairo Quintana may go one better.
Of the individuals without wheels, Rory McIlroy, injury-free, will regain his world number one spot, Andy Murray will win another major (but not the Davis Cup this time) and Tyson Fury will beat Wladimir Klitschko again.
Manchester City v Newcastle United - Premier League
Manchester City could top the Premier League in 2016
England's footballers will see off Wales at the European Championships and reach the semi-finals (France to win on home soil amid much emotion), and Manchester City will be Premier League champions.
India will take cricket's World Twenty20 and England will draw their test series in South Africa.
In the Six Nations rugby, despite the impetus of new coach Eddie Jones, England (and the rest) will find Wales too good as their injured stars return. That kicks off the action on the field.
Off it, we start with another WADA report on doping. And that, I fear, really will set the tone for the year.
If a review of sport in 12 months does not heavily feature drugs, resignations, match-fixing and suspensions, I will be pleasantly surprised.
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